In 2011 I learnt lots of new things, things about myself, things about others and new skills. The skill I am most proud of is my new found ability to saw. It was one of the many things girls were not allowed to do. So I never learnt how to saw, I was told it would be too difficult, I might chop off my fingers etc. Of the three siblings I am the most mechanically minded, I have the straightest eye, I take instruction well, I am the most skilled when it comes to arts and crafts, oh and did I mention I am a fully qualified engineer. My ex husband would not let me saw either. Last year I decided rather than taking an old wooden chair to the dump I would burn it, so I needed to chop it up. Finally I had to learn to saw. I borrowed a saw from my ex (stole it actually) . I googled how to saw, really could it be that difficult and lo and behold : Sawing is so easy. I am never returning the saw, I love it. There is a knack to everything and the knack with sawing is to move your arm from your shoulder, keep your lower arm in line with the saw and hey presto where there was a whole piece of wood now you have two, as if by magic. My pourch now smells like a pine forest as I just sawed the Christmas tree into pieces. I discovered the joys of squishing all the tiny resin filled nodules on the tree to extract even more piney loveliness. Imagine if I never leaned to saw I would never have known about how to increase the piney smell from Christmas trees. All the smell seems to come from the resin.
There is usually a point in my post and here is today's lesson for me, Do not be limited by other peoples expectations of you. I wish I learnt that sooner but no matter at least I learnt the lesson. The next skill I plan to learn is to roller blade, I was considered a clumsy child and therefore did not try lots of things involving balance, but I discovered that I actually have excellent balance (through yoga). I recently watched an older lady ( my daughters called her elderly) smile with absolute joy while ice skating. There was a temporary ice rink installed locally for Christmas. We chatted briefly and she told me in her mind she was gliding like a swan and that she loved skating when she was younger. She was the oldest person the the rink by about 40 years. How many of us miss out on things that could be life changing experiences or amazing fun just because we are locked into a mindset of cant, that we are too old, too unfit, too ladylike to do that. I started to blog last year shortly after using a water slide for the first time in my life. Experiencing the exhilaration of speeding down the slide was perhaps the thing that triggered my recovery. I forgot that for a while as I struggled with my low mood for the last month, but the evenings are getting longer, the day I have been dreading (today) came and went in a very uneventful way. My new job (which I started today) is much easier than I thought it would be and I suppose I forgot some of the lessons of 2011: remember to take baby steps in the right direction, and always carry a saw :-)